Monthly Archives: July 2012

Making Your Space Count

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In the neighborhood where we work, residents do not have much space for a yard. The churchyard is about 4 feet by 20 feet and that is probably the only yard space in the immediate community.

The median between street lanes and space between the sidewalk and the street, however, has been put to good use by the neighborhood inhabitants. For example, even though a section of the median is used as a small landfill, about 100 feet away there is a stretch of concrete about 4 feet by 30 feet that has been taken over by elderly men in the community. One gentleman is out by 6:30 most mornings checking out “their” space. He will look for trash, pull a weed, and about once a week bring a bottle of liquid that he uses to scrub any stains on the concrete slab. He sits and “protects” the area until his buddies arrive an hour or two later. Someone brings the card table and dominoes and the rest of the morning is spent determining the domino champion.

One morning I was on the sidewalk waiting for a ride when I noticed a man across the street bringing out a birdcage from his home. I saw a bird in the cage, and as I watched, the man went to a young tree that was surrounded by a lattice. The man opened a door built into the lattice and inserted the cage. I could barely see a platform for the cage as he closed the door and walked away. The bird had an outdoor home during the day even though his owner had only a street front apartment and no yard.

I never think of conserving space or making better use of the space I have in the United States. But when your space is limited, you see what space you do have in a different light.

As Joseph Campbell wrote, “Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again.” I am inspired by the way people find ways to find themselves again and again. Once we find ourselves, we are more equipped to help others.

Round It Off!

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In Brazil you don’t have to worry about getting too many pennies in your purse or pocket. There are no cent coins. Everyone rounds off to the nearest whole amount.

Their currency, the real, pronounced HAY-EYE, equals 100 cents and is worth about 50 cents on the U. S. dollar. The direct two-to-one exchange rate makes it easy to know how much something costs in the currency I’m most familiar with. But their inattention to small change helps even more.

When I give more than needed to a cab driver or the neighborhood grocer, he or she rounds off my change to the nearest real. At the supermarket, the cashier rounds to the nearest cent, so even if the amount shows R$27,32, I’m only charged R$27,30. (Yes, their use of commas and periods in money amounts is the opposite of ours.)

Tipping is not expected in restaurants or when taking a cab. If you have a large group, a 10% surcharge is added. No calculations needed.

Buses do not run on a schedule most of the time, so you don’t have to worry about making the 3:13 bus. You just get to the stop in the general time period you want a ride and always plan on arriving earlier versus later. So again, you can round off your leaving time.

Worship services generally are liberal about starting time. In the five weeks we have been here, if you arrive five minutes after the designated starting time, you will definitely be on time, and possibly so at ten minutes after. So just assume you need to be present around 10:00 a.m., more or less. (“More or less” is a common Brazilian expression so our students learned the English for that early on.)

These examples show why there is a more relaxed atmosphere in conducting day-to-day activities in Brazil than there is in the United States.

So now when my Kroger bill is $8.65 and I give the cashier $9.00, I can’t leave right away. I must remember to wait for my change!

Thumbs Up!

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I speak no Portuguese, and English is not a common language here in Natal, Brazil. But after much trial and error, I have found that one nonverbal cue seems to be understood by all. That is the thumbs-up sign.

(In the 50s, Vice President Richard Nixon was not aware of this and insulted the entire nation of Brazil by giving the forefinger to thumb A-OK sign! If he’d only chosen the thumbs-up signal….)

On several occasions I have attempted to explain something to a cab driver, a cashier, or a person I am seeking information from. After much waving of hands and a variety of facial expressions, hoping the other person will understand, he or she will show the thumbs up expression to indicate “I understand,” or “I will do it.” Of course that is usually complemented by a smile. But I never realized such a simple nonverbal cue could be so rewarding.

Fortunately, our American missionary host, Cris, speaks Portuguese as well as a Brazilian, so for most of the difficult communication times I will wait until she is available. She will call a cab, give me directions, or accompany me on an errand. I usually smile and nod my head as though I know exactly what Cris is saying on my behalf.

I am aware that the thumbs-up sign is not universally accepted. In fact, there are countries where that sign is an insult. I understand that some research is necessary before I travel in other countries. But for now, thumbs-up works for me.

I fear that when I get back to the States I will continue conversing with the thumbs up sign at the ends of conversations. I’ll simply nod my head and smile as my wife seeks information or talks to a cashier. Good thing for me that it’s acceptable in the United States as well as Brazil.

Get to the Point

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Getting to the point is difficult for most people. We have all been bored to the point of distraction by a speaker who speaks an hour when he or she could have made the points in 20 minutes. Don’t be the person who in conversation takes five minutes to tell a story when the narrative could have been finished in two minutes.

I want a person to get to the point quickly. When you do, people listen better and are more likely to remember the message delivered. One of my favorite examples is a movie title a few summers ago, “Snakes On a Plane.” That said all I needed to know. Maybe that is one reason the movie stayed in theatres for such a short time (about one week).

My wife says that when she takes too long in her narrative that I say, “Point!” Surely not. She must be exaggerating.

Inauguration speeches of Presidents often are too long. One of the shortest and most memorable was the inauguration speech John F. Kennedy delivered that was 14 minutes in length. Lincoln spoke two minutes at Gettysburg and had one of the greatest speeches of all time. Edward Everett, the featured speaker at the dedication of the cemetery at Gettysburg and great orator of the period, spoke two hours and most people don’t even remember his name. Everett later said to Lincoln, “I should be glad I could flatter myself that I came as near the central idea of the occasion in two hours as you did in two minutes.”

Keep your conversation contributions short and to the point. In delivering a presentation, speak a little short of your allotted time; never go over time. An effective presentation can lose its power when the speaker talks longer than the audience expects him or her to. A mediocre speech may not seem so bad to an audience if the speaker gets to the point quickly and sits down.

To be more effective as a communicator, get to the point. Conciseness is golden.

An Unusual Landfill

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One of the blessings I never thought much about is the USA system of disposing of trash. Landfills may not always have the best aroma as you pass by them along a highway, but they are much better than what I have experienced on the street adjacent to our building in Natal. The street has two lanes going in each direction with a median in the middle. That does not sound at all unusual. Many city streets in the United States have medians separating lanes. And trees line the median, as is the case in America.

However, in this city, on a busy street, the median serves as a landfill. About 100 yards from our apartment is a trash disposal area. Yesterday morning I noticed that someone had dumped a washing machine and a fan for us all to observe. Those objects were in the middle of what you would typically find in a landfill.

Interestingly enough, during the day someone had taken the washing machine and replaced it with a nondescript piece of junk. For the three weeks I have been here, that location has received all kinds of discarded lumber, wire, and family garbage, as well as brush from nearby palm trees. That was the first time I had ever observed that someone had exchanged pieces of trash.

One day I watched a man pick up a discarded cardboard box. I thought, “Well, at least he is going to put the trash in the landfill area.” No, he wanted the trash out of his space where he played dominoes with several other men. Instead he threw it in the middle of the street away from him. I guess any area that is not your personal space is appropriate for a trash collection area.

On another day, city workers in what looked like a flat bed garbage truck, stopped at the landfill area. I thought, “Good, that trash is finally going to be picked up.“ One man got in the middle of the pile of trash and threw some pieces of old lumber on the flatbed. Then he got back in the truck and drove away.

From what I can observe, no one seems to mind about the accumulation of trash; it is accepted as a way of life.

Probably people from Natal would look at the endless number of orange barrels that seem to dominate our highways and create traffic jams for miles and observe, “How do these people stand to have these ugly objects dotting the highway landscape?” I guess we all have frustrations about our surroundings; we simply get used to them.

However, in the future, I plan to collect our household trash without complaint. On Monday morning I will enthusiastically take the cans to the curb in anticipation of the garbage trucks picking up the trash and disposing of it in a well-kept landfill 30 miles away.

 

High Stakes Dominoes

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I’ve learned the past few weeks in Natal how much the role of curiosity plays in what we pay attention to. Almost every morning, very early, I sit on our third floor balcony, which overlooks a busy city street with a median between the lanes of traffic. The median ncludes palm trees, much trash, old abandoned tires, and a small amount of space that is a tiny park with seats embedded in the concrete floor.

What draws my attention to the middle section of the street is an elderly man who comes to the same spot on the median and stands observing traffic and people.

He follows the same pattern each day. He will cross the street to his spot in the park-like area of the median, stand, and turn completely around to observe the people and the traffic. He looks down at the ground and searches for a weed to pull up, pitches it away from his space, rubs his hands together, sits on the same stool with one foot on the seat of a nearby stool, and watches. He wears flip-flops, a net tank top, and short pants. The clothes always match colors and his hair is carefully combed.

After he finishes these rituals, he greets anyone who comes near his spot.

The gentleman usually stays an hour and then leaves—probably to go home for breakfast.

Most days I see him a little later with 4-5 other “retirees” sitting on the stools playing dominoes (See picture at end of article). The many cars and motorcycles that pass by on each side do not distract them. About noon they disperse and the same routine is repeated most days .

Since I do not speak Portuguese, I can only speculate on their conversation. Do they discuss the rainy season, the amount of traffic, complain about the government? And how about the dominoes game? Do they lay money on the table and the winner gets the pot? Or is this a game just to while the time away?

I can’t resist watching each morning the rituals that unfold and the discussion over dominoes that ensues. I’m simply curious and that alone keeps my attention. Dominoes anyone? What kinds of things are you curious about? What holds your attention? Are they curious about the Americano who sits on the third-floor balcony watching them?

 

The High 5: Tips for Improving Your Speaking

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I listened to thousands of student speeches in my 42 years of college teaching. In addition, I have preached nearly 3,000 sermons and delivered over 1,800 paid programs as a professional speaker. So you can imagine that I have opinions on how to become a better speaker.

Whether you are a novice speaker or a veteran presenter, here are five high points that help a speaker improve.

  1. Speak! The more you speak the better you will become. Join Toastmasters International. Volunteer to give reports at department or professional meetings. Give continuing education talks for your profession. Volunteer to give devotionals at church. Speak up at open meetings that you have a vested interest in. I believe my best speech is my next one because I will have the added experience of the one I’m delivering.
  2. Watch other speakers. Listen and observe. What does the speaker do well? Why? What does the speaker do poorly? How can he or she improve? Take notes on his or her strengths. Watch how the audience responds to the techniques the speaker used. Go to book signings of popular authors. Recently, I listened as Erik Larson spoke to a group of about 200 concerning his new book, In the Garden of Beasts. He was an excellent speaker and was especially effective in answering questions. I learned how to respond more effectively to the questioner who likes to make his or her own statements rather than ask a specific question. His examples were relevant and all related to his new book or his previous popular ones. Since the audience members were there because they admire his work, using examples from his previous books actively engaged his audience.
  3. Review each speech you deliver. Write down things you did well or areas you want to do differently the next time you speak. Ask someone to listen to a speech you are about to deliver and give you feedback. Videotape a speech and watch it soon after you finish. The speech will be fresh on your mind. Make each presentation a learning experience for the next time you speak. A friend of mine was a speechwriter for the CEO of a large insurance company. On the flight back from a speaking engagement he and the President of the company would debrief the speech just delivered. This was one reason the CEO was an effective speaker.
  4. Read everything you can find on your topic. Become an expert on your subject. The more you know about your topic the more comfortable you will feel in speaking and the more excited you will be with your material. Interview people who have lots of experience in your subject matter. They will provide fresh and relevant examples that you will not find in articles and books.
  5. Know your audience. Never speak without having a specific audience in mind as you prepare. A key part of your preparation should be looking at the company website. Call people who will be in your audience and ask about current issues and interests of the people. Talk to the person in charge of the event to get his or her perspective on the context of the speech. The more you know about your audience, the more effective you will be as a speaker. Read here about a time when a committee chair did not know her audience.

Becoming a better speaker has no easy formula, but these are five high points that will help you consistently to become an effective speaker. Don’t become discouraged at developing your craft.

As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “All the great speakers were bad speakers at first.”