Monthly Archives: May 2010

Make Every Word Count

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We live in a society of words—too many words and often words that do not count. "You know," "and everything," "stuff," and "let me be frank," are typical. We don't pay close attention because there is so much fluff. So if you want to make people listen, make every word count.

    At the beginning of your presentation, don't begin with "I'm glad to be here…" or "What a pleasure it is…"  We assume those feelings without being reminded. I often begin my speech  "Be Present When You are Present" with "The single greatest secret of success is paying attention."  I find that grabs their attention and I am into my speech quickly.

    One of the reasons we remember the words spoken when Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin landed on the moon on July 20, 1969, is because they were succinct and brief. We can still probably quote them. "Houston, Tranquility Base. The eagle has landed."  And then: "One small step for man; one giant leap for mankind."  No unnecessary words.

    In starting a conversation on the phone, begin with, "This is [your name], and I'm calling to…." So many people who call in to talk shows begin with "How are you doing?" or "Thanks for taking my call," or "I enjoy your show." Start by giving your name to the host and then your point and you will be well-received.

    Calvin Coolidge was a man of few words. A young woman sitting next to Coolidge at a dinner party confided to him she had bet she could get at least three words of conversation from him. Without looking at her he quietly retorted, "You lose." And in 1928, while vacationing in the Black Hills of South Dakota, he issued the most famous of his succinct statements, "I do not choose to run for President in 1928."

    Be brief with words and what you do speak will be remembered.

Caring and Communication

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As a speaker, you must show your audiences that you care. You can do that by being prepared, adapting your material specifically to that audience, learning the background of the group to which you are speaking, and generally being pleasant in your demeanor.

But there is one other caring ingredient that is huge with audiences—and with people in general—and that is to be a person who serves others. Willie Jolley, an excellent motivator and entertainer said recently in a speech, “Service is the rent we pay for our space on this planet.” That speaks volumes about our life responsibilities.

Demonstrating a life of service will develop your credibility as a communicator, whether in front of an audience of one or one hundred, and will enhance your message and your ability to move people to action. One major way of doing that is to mentor younger people in your career, or in a talent that you have. A goal for all to seek is to replace ourselves in the marketplace. What talents and interests do you have that benefit everyone? Whatever they are, train people to do them so when you move on to the next level in life, there is someone to take your place. I love to speak, so I seek to help young people in their public speaking skills. My two children now have children of their own, so I share my philosophy of parenting to young couples when the opportunity arises. I remember what it was like when I had not a clue what was involved in being a parent.

One other way of demonstrating service is to have a favorite charity or special group that you are passionate about. My Christian walk is most important to me and thus every other summer I spend a month as a missionary to a third world country. There I help people who want to be better at speaking English by using the book of Luke as a basis for them to practice their English.

We are on this planet for a short period of time; let’s combine caring and communicating to make the world a better place in which to live.

Speaking Anxiety: Eliminating the “What Ifs”

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A perplexing challenge for any speaker is to arrest the anxiety of “What if ___ happens during my speech?” Psychologists tell us that the apprehension of the unknown is one of our greatest fears. If you can anticipate the “what ifs,” then you will be more comfortable and confident as you speak. One “what if” is “What if I forget what I want to say next in my presentation?” Don’t panic. Pause a moment, and often the thought will come to you. If it doesn’t by this time, the audience will notice. So after a pause, admit to your audience, “I’ve forgotten my next point. Give me a moment to find my place in my notes [or on PowerPoint.]” Most audiences are very understanding; forgetting is a human trait, so they will identify with your quandary and be pulling for you. Whatever you do, do not try to “fake it.” Be honest with your audience and then move on.

Another “what if” is “What if the public address system either quits or starts giving me feedback noises?”Again the key for any emergency situation while speaking is not to panic, because often the pause will be enough time for the emergency to go away. Take a step or simply tap the microphone; sometimes that will stop the feedback or reconnect to the system. If that does not work, ask for the person in charge to provide help (which often happens without your saying anything.) If it is a group under 50 in a room with low ceilings, you might simply turn the system off since everyone will be able to hear.

A difficult situation is when there is any kind of interruption, such as a small group having their own conversation. Often peer pressure will take care of the distraction if you will simply look at another part of the room. As a last resort you might gently suggest that they hold the conversation until after your speech.

Sometimes a person interrupts with a comment or question as you are speaking. Of course if you have told the audience you will take questions anytime, the interruption may be rude, but you can simply stop and answer the question. If you ignore the situation and the person persists, you might remind in a kind manner that if he or she will hold the question, you will answer questions at the end of your presentation. Seek to avoid this extreme measure because you will lose continuity of thought in your speech both for you and the audience.

Finally, if someone passes out or in some other way shows there is a medical emergency, simply say, “Let’s stop until this emergency situation is taken care of.” Pause, and give instructions that might help the medical personnel to get to the stricken person quickly. After the person is assisted, thank the medical people and continue your presentation.

These “what if” answers will guide you to making the unknown known. As Patrick Overton said, “When we walk to the edge of all the light we have and take the step into the darkness of the unknown, we must believe that one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for us to stand on or we will be taught to fly.”

Stephen D. Boyd, Ph.D., CSP, is Professor of Speech Communication, College of Informatics, Northern Kentucky University, near Cincinnati. He presents keynotes and seminars to corporations and associations whose people want to speak and listen effectively. See additional articles and resources at www.sboyd.com. To book Steve, call 800-727-6520 or email him through his website.

The Speech of Response

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Sometimes you have to respond publicly to an honor, an action, or an announcement. Often you do not have much time to prepare and your remarks may not be very astute and structured.  

   Recently I listened to the response of a woman who had just received a major award from the college. You could tell she was not used to speaking in front of an audience. When she came to the lectern, she tentatively looked over the audience of 100 and said, "If I had one iota of an idea that I would win this award I would have bought a new dress."  The audience loved this response. She went on to say, "I come from a small town and I love that intimate and friendly atmosphere, so in my classes I want my students to feel like they have come from a small town, too."  She then thanked the people responsible for the award and sat down.

    I think she taught some valuable lessons in how to respond when you are surprised to do so. First, she took a moment to collect her thoughts. She did not start speaking until she had looked at the audience and paused. Second, she spoke from the heart. You could tell this was just an honest expression of her thoughts at this special time in her career. Third, she was brief. You may repeat yourself after two or three minutes or speak in vague generalities as you seek to say something meaningful. And finally, she tied her response directly to what required her to speak—the acceptance of this special award.

    Others have followed this formula as well. For instance, Jane Wyman, accepting an Oscar in 1949 for playing a mute character in "Johnny Belinda" said, "I accept this very gratefully for keeping my mouth shut for once. I think I'll do it again."  And she sat down.